We did it!  We sold our house!!  I can't believe it happened so quickly!! We close May 29th, and you'll never guess where we are going to live,..........

Back to Belmont People!  

Peter just couldn't stand being away from there for too long.  

Back to the 3rd floor we go.  We have many of fond memories there.  It's where we spent our first 2.5 years of married life.  We brought our first little baby home there,.. which means I puked there A LOT,.. maybe even in the stairwell,.. oops.  This time,.. with 3 kids.  I'm sure the single guys that fill the stairwell are going to LOVE us! :D  

The summer will be spent at Seven Peaks, and Bear Lake,.. I'm sure of it.  

Although I am DREADING 2 flights of stairs, with 3 kids this time,... I am actually kind of excited.  Less house to clean, and lazy days in our swim suits at the pool.  And let's be honest,.. Cy's little bald chubbiness is going to be AMAZING in a swimsuit.  Too bad we aren't having a summer long reunion with our dear friends that were there with us last time.  :(  

I better start packing!

p.s. We will be living there interm,.. until our new house is done being built.  Which we are SUPER stoked about!

The Winds of Change

As many have probably seen our recent announcement on Facebook,.. But if not,...

We are moving!!!

I can't really believe it. Peter decided to take a different job in Salt Lake,.. And I would rather not be a single mom to his job+commute,.. Thus the For Sale sign in the front yard. It's a big step,..and although sad and scary,..it's exciting as well. It's the opitomy of bitter-sweet.

So we are going to move to Centerville, well, actually Farmington. But the kids will be going to the Elementary School Peter went to, and all of their cousins will go. We will live just 5 minutes from Grandma and Grandpa Robbins, and their cousins. We will be close to Peter's work, closer to Logan, and my mom and dad. It's good.

(note: I'm not writing the cons,...)

So,... I'll put on my happy face and pack up our house that I brought 2 of my 3 babies home to, and we will make our home all over again(twice,.. Cause we are going to build, and we'll have to live back at Belmont till it's done,....yippie!!!!) and bring more babies home to it,... Hopefully not for a few years!

I can do this.

Just keep breathing.

Nursing Update

As you can imagine, the word nipple will be said many a times here people.

Some people have asked, and also to remember what I did for what, if I ever have this horrid experience again, I can come back to this.  (I better not)

After talking to my doctor about not nursing for 2 weeks, I decided to get a second opinion from a Lactation Nurse.  it was 2 days after meeting with my doctor and she had some good advice,.. and also noticed infection.  REALLY?  Throw me a bone!!!  INFECTION?  Then suggested(with much trepidation) that I start a round of antibiotics.  UGH.  Antibiotics are what got me here in the first place!(I was Group B Positive, AND had surgery, AND they kept me open almost twice as long as a "normal" C-Section){I will never know normal}

(incase you didn't know,..  Antibiotics are great,.. they kill infection,.. but they also kill all the good bacteria,..Yeast,... and then the yeast goes wild, and takes over)(Melanie Carr will kill me for this)

If you know me very well,.. I am always willing to try the homeopathic ways to heal almost anything.  I was REALLY leery of taking the antibiotics.  The Lactation nurse suggested the antibiotics, double up on the Diflucan, treating Cy for Thrush(yeast in their mouth) Probiotics, and Neumans Ointment.  I did almost none of these. 

 I did the Diflucan, and Probiotics.  I got a new bottle of Colloidal Silver,and went to town.(this stuff is being tested like crazy because it has shown that it will kill MRSA, and Staph, and all sorts of horrific bacterias) I would soak my nipples in it for 5 mintues, 3 times a day.  Other suggestions I got were to just let those suckers dry out.  So I was shirtless for most of the last 2 weeks.  (Poor Chloe HATED it,.. she was always telling me to pull my shirt down)  and then I would put the silver on them after every pump.  I gave Cy 3 or 4 days of thrush medicine.  On day 14, the last scab fell off.  YEA!

So,.. we started back to breast only last night, and although it was a rough start, things are going better.  I realized after trying to get Cy to latch back onto the right side, I had only ever held him with my left arm to give him bottles,.. so he really resisted turning his head, to eat on the other side.  But I let him get good and hungry and he latched back on like a pro!!  we are just 3 feedings in, but so far, no real signs of a problem.  I DID start taking nursing supplements to get my supply back up so he wouldn't be hungry at all.  Fenugreek and Blessed Thistle.  Amazing stuff.  My hands smell like Maple Syrup.  

Through all of this, I really clung on to a blessing my sweet husband gave me.  It was sweet and gave me the hope I needed to get through it all.  

Also having been through all of this, I quickly realized that I CAN do hard things.  If I can feed a baby for 8 weeks on cracked nipples, I can do anything.  I know that might sound weird, but I feel accomplished in that I came out on top, when I was SOOOO close to giving up.  The last 6 months I have been really down on my self for "never accomplishing anything".  I skimmed by okay in High School, I never graduated college, I never "lost the weight".  But I have a whole new outlook, and determination to conquer.  Even if it's a daily conquering of the house, or finishing that project, or in fact losing that weight.  I'm gonna do it.  Watch me.

As you can see,.. he is being well nourished.

Cy's Blessing

We were able to bless this little amazing baby on Sunday March 25th.  He was a perfect little angel.  Peter said he just laid there with his eyes wide open and listened intently.  Peter did a wonderful job blessing him, and we were so grateful to have such wonderful men be in the circle.  He continued to be perfect and amazing all day.  Being passed around and kissed on by all his adoring family.  We loved having everyone at our house after for a yummy brunch feast.  

We woke up Sunday Morning, and both Peter and I were amazed at the change in our baby, over night.  We had barely gotten any smiles out of him, at ALL, and no coos yet.  It was literally over night, he just started cooing like crazy, and smiling like a mad man.  It was SOOO wonderful.  I was getting seriously impatient!

 All 5 of us.

 Great Grandma Robbins

Great Grandma Nielson

Grandpa Robbins

Grandma Robbins

Grandma Patti

Papa Chuck

Mamma's Boy

 Daddy's mini me

 Left to Right:  Uncle Dave, Uncle Will, Uncle Andy, Peter and Cy, Grandpa Robbins, Papa Chuck, Uncle(cousin) Perrin, Uncle Dave, Uncle Bob.  Missing: Uncle Baby Chase. (Bailey and Chloe's awesome nickname for their newest Uncle.

What a great day.  

Family of 5

Life is good.  

We are adjusting well to life as a family of 5.  I have a hard time ever missing out on something potentially fun,.. so we pack up and go,.. even if it means pumping in public, or missing much needed naps.  We don't miss out on fun.  But we also really enjoy our lazy days at home.  

Poor Chloe.  I was getting so caught up in nursing ALL. DAY. LONG.  That nap time frequently got forgotten about until it was too late, and this is what happens:

 Chloe stole my Dr. Pepper,.. it clearly didn't give her the energy boost it gives her mamma.

The girls have been obsessed with "forts" lately.  On this particular day, Chloe found the iPad, and was watching Alladin when she fell asleep,.. then Bailey stumbled upon her helpless little sister, and built a fort to protect her.  Don't worry,.. I had to move the pillow from the top to even find her.  Love these girls!

Poor Chloe.  

We have gone on a few little adventures, other than the grocery store,.. which truly IS an adventure with 3 kids, by my self.

We went with cousins to "This is the Place Heritage Park"  We love our Best friend cousins.

Okay,.. most of our outings have been to Centerville.  Aren't these binkies wicked awesome?  And isn't Sammy sooo cute.  I call him Elvis,.. cause let's be honest,.. what caucasian baby is born with that much hair?  

We are getting back to normal, and MAN it feels good!

6 weeks

We made it to 6 weeks,.. we are alive!!  yea!!!

But just barely.

So prepare your self for a lot of nipple talk, and a lot of emotion.  This is more so i can remember how things happened, and what to remember for next time (heaven help me if this happens again with another kid!)

After week 3, I thought things were on the up,.. but then I got 3 more cracks on my good ole' nipples, and you do not know pain, until you feed a baby off of cracked, bleeding nipples.  So I thought it was still yeast problems.  I called my doctors office and they gave me a strong prescription to KILL the yeast.  It is doing it's job,.. but now imagine trying to heal giant cracks with a baby still latching on to them.  They just got worse,.. and worse.  So after 6 LONG weeks,.. lots of tears, LOTS of creams, and solutions, and pads, and more tears,.. I went into my doctor, who confirmed the fears that they weren't healing.  So,.. consensus,.. I have to pump ONLY for 2 weeks, and hope and pray, and hope and pray some more that this baby prefers the breast over those dumb bottles.  (If you want to hope and pray for us too,.. I'll take it)   

Around the 3 week mark also,.. I thought okay, this baby should be sleeping more than 2 hours at night, and should NOT be crying and fussing for 3 hours, and it wasn't a normal cry,.. it was a painful cry, and he would arch his back, and crunch his tummy, and spit up curdled milk.  I thought for sure it was a little reflux, so,.. off to the doctor I went.  Came home with a diagnosis of Reflux AND Colic.  Poor baby.  a little education on Colic,.. I didn't know anything other than babies with Colic, cry,.... A LOT.  Which Cy did, but only about 2 hours in the afternoon, and 3 at night.  And wanted to be held ALL THE TIME.  Colic is a tightening of the stomach, which can also cause reflux.  So a little muscle relaxer and some antacid and this baby is a whole new baby.  Sleeping almost 4 hours at night(still no Bailey) and smiling, and I can lay him down.  I can now take showers!!!!!  

So honestly, this has been the most difficult 6 weeks I have ever had to endure.   Being EXHAUSTED, mixed with a fussy baby, 2 other kids who need a mommy, and not getting hardly ANY sleep, has been the most physically demanding, emotionally draining experience,.. TOGETHER.  

Lots of prayers have been said in the wee hours of the morning, tears streaming down my face, praying that it would get better, that I could make it through the next day and not have a nervous break down.  I am here to testify that the Lord is aware of me(of you too) and my trials(yours too!) and that he is there to comfort me,.. even if it's not immediate, or even if the outcome isn't what I want.  

I am grateful for my Heavenly Father, who loves me, and cares for me, and WANTS to be apart of my life, and help me through each day.  I am grateful for my beautiful little family.  

3 weeks, 3 kids

3 kids!  I have 3 kids,.. I can't really believe that.  I look at them each and I know they are mine,.. but then when I stop to think about it,.. I think,.. "when is their real mom coming to get them?"  It's just not really real.  

Over all,.. having 3 kids hasn't been as bad as I freaked my self out about,.... having 3 kids,.. 2 of which are SUPER sick, and a husband that is sick,.. one of those sick kids ends up with pneumonia, all with-in 3 weeks of having a baby,... THAT is stressful.  All I wanted to do was comfort Chloe, and snuggle her,.. but I had to keep my interaction with her to a minimum.  Luckily the worst of it was over a weekend, and the 3 sickies could hang out together, and little baby Cy and I stayed in our room for 4 days. I got in quite a few full seasons of shows that I didn't care an ounce about,.. but now I feel the need to watch.  dumb T.V.  good thing I have plenty of down time with nursing,... and this kid LOVES nursing. 

Speaking of nursing.  I think having a C-section with out Anesthesia would have felt better than my experience with nursing this time around.   If anyone has had a problem with Candida Yeast, you may understand what I am talking about.  Nursing Bailey was painful, and I'm pretty sure I had SOME yeast problems with her,... but even that is NOTHING in comparison to this.  Cy is almost 4 weeks old, and I still cry every time he latches on, almost.  I don't think anything compares to cracked, bleeding nipples, and still letting an infant latch on a suck on them for 20 minutes.  H.E.L.L.  

So having 3 kids is a breeze. 

Having 3 kids, 2 of them being sick, one with pneumonia,.. easy peasy.

Nursing this go around,.. torture. (I tell my self every time he latches on,...It will get better, it will get better, it will get better)  I hope I'm right.