Since having Chloe, I have come to realize that my children have sucked my body dry of it's youthful elasticity.
This tummy will never be the same.
(until I make that phone call to Dr. Bindrup)
The pregnancy weight didn't take long to lose,.. there were only 26 lbs of it. (I know it looked a lot steeper!)
I went to my 6 week check up and,............
Since the day BEFORE I delivered (it makes me feel better to count from then) I have lost,.....
drum roll please
48 lbs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WHAT? I kept thinking,.. where the HECK did it go,.. then I looked at my baby.
{Pretty much my new favorite picture!}
Yes,.. she just skipped from Newborn clothes to 3-6 month clothes. A little tear because she is getting so big,.. but NO tears about my weight!!!!
(I don't know if you can hear it,.. but there are heavenly choirs singing!)
But the weight loss isn't helping my "mama pouch".
{BTW,.. Santa can in NO WAY compare his tummy to a bowl full of jelly, he has never had a baby,.. unless Santa was really a female,.. which,.. now that I think about makes a lot of sense,.. Remembering who wants what, and where they live, and if they have been good or not, and that's not even mentioning making and organizing all those presents!!!}
ANYWAY,.. I am really good at getting off track!
I want Spanks,. or is it Spanx? I don't know!? But when looking on line at them, I was super ticked to find this,.....
Who does this chick think she is!?
Like she needs Spanx!?
Let me spell this out for you:
I feel like crap about my body,.. I search for a solution to the problem. I think of this heaven sent invention, and when I find it, it's a HUGE slap in the face.
I think I will go eat my emotions now.
-Spanx,.. but no Spanx!
15 comments:
yeah that's like my Kiera Knightly wearing a girdle...SO unnecessary! LOL.
Congrats on your 48-lb loss! That is AWESOME! I hope after I have a baby that I lose the pound-age like that!
48 lbs is amazing! wow!
Also, I totally agree with you about the picture (gag), and about Santa...I hadn't ever thought of it before, but there's gotta be a woman helping him out somehow =).
p.s. you are hilarious and i love you.
pretty funny :) congrats on the baby weight girl!!!
reese is PACKING on the lbs. patrick said i should sell my milk. its like creme apparently :) ha. we must make some good vitamin D milk thats for sure.
do you love that blanket?
You are awesome and I envy you :)
LOL Seriously!! That girl needs a good kick in her tiny non-butt. Let me tell you though...Spanx has been SO nice!! Even when you're done losing the baby weight, you still have that super-attractive mommy-tummy-jiggle and these are the BOMB for keepin' it all sucked in!! I love mine. They keep my g's all tucked in too...
Oh goodness Chloe is a chubby little girl isn't she! That's exciting about how much weight you have lost! So...when can we get together? I really would like to you know...
Yes I absolutely remember you, Amanda! How could I forget the Ashley, Stephanie and Amanda trio of Raintree commons? :) You have a fabulous blog, with beautiful pictures of your family. Congrats on two precious daughters! Hope you have been doing well the past few years. Glad we can keep in touch this way. ;)
Ok, this post was hilarious. You're right, Santa doesn't have a thing on us girls who have given birth. Oh, and get the Spanx/ks. I used to have some and they were AWESOME.
Atleast you have a baby to blame it on..... my excuse.... those
d a m n(that is spelled out so it isn't technically a swear word) chocolates that keep jumping down my throat!
no freaking way! how did you do that so fast? rice cakes? slim jims? come on whats your secret. way to go you. i think this calls for a party! a big party!! i'm in! oh, and about the spanx girl...she may have a nice boot-tay but haven't you ever wondered why they don't show their faces...CAUSE THEIR UGLY! {at least that's what i tell myself to feel better!}
First off I want to congratulate you on your weight loss! Second, I went and bought something similar at Wally world (and you're right, that girl in the picture shouldn't be wearing one of those). I love it cause I can fit into somewhat normal clothes (especially pants), and I look like I have a pretty nice tummy (which I don't). They're kind of a pain to get into (once it's on I'm in it for the rest of the day) but well worth it cause you look fabulous!
I always love reading your blog. You are such a good writer - super funny too!
That pic truly is rediculous...
but, YOU are amazing - 48 lbs!!! Way to go Mama.
I miss you and want to come and see you soon - things are crazy as always.
Anyhoot, you're the best. Loves to you all!
just in your defense, YOU JUST HAD A BABY! your body is still trying to recoup from being stretched. Don't hate. and congratulations on the 48 lbs, I think I would be writing a bragging post rather than a spanx post! you're HOT! (p.s. LOVE the chubbs picture of Chloe!!!!!!)
Not gonna lie, I bust those almost all the time. With the combo of the mama pouch and the garments, then your skirt/jeans...its just an automatic 3 roll DISASTA!!! p.s. good job already getting it all off, Carder is over a year and I still don't feel like its gone! :)
Amanda, you crack me up! All of your posts are hilarious! But I will say, Dr. Bindrup is the man! He hooked me up in December with something I was never blessed with! That man is a genius! And he went to school with both my parents! Not that it matters, just a little tid bit!
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